Fun With NBA 2K13 Headshots

Manu does his best McKayla Maroney impression

The NBA 2K franchise is one of the most anticipated and highly acclaimed video game releases each year and this year’s edition did not disappoint. From Hip-Hop mogul Jay-Z picking the tracks for the game to being able to play as both the Dream Team and this year’s Olympic team, the 2K13 edition of the series was definitely more than a roster update.

Like many of you I purchased the game as soon as it came out Tuesday and I haven’t been able to put it down. I even put my undefeated season on NCAA 13 on hold to dive into the NBA Live Killer.

Maybe I’m just so immersed in the game or my taste in what’s interesting is off this week but I thought I’d dive into one of the most overlooked aspects of NBA 2K13 – the headshots on the Manage Roster screens.

I literally went through every roster and came up with a list of some of the most “what were they thinking when they took this picture?” headshots in the game. I also threw in a couple random observations on some of the mugs in the game.

Check out the list below and let me know if I missed any other notable headshots in the game. You can also let me know if I have too much time on my hands.

Manu does his best McKayla Maroney impression.


Nope. Westbrook didn’t gain a bunch of weight. That’s Daniel Orton. 


Speaking of getting fat. I think this headshot is totally inaccurate of Lamar. He’s been eating a little too much candy lately. 

The Worm always looked a little off after his Bad Boy days but what’s up with his neck here? Great Photoshop job guys.

To be fair Ostertag kind of looked weird anyways. I didn’t think he looked like a used pencil eraser though. 

Either Martell went Super Saiyan before his shoot or he was channeling his inner Morris Day and the Time.

To be honest I have no idea who this guy is and he took a normal picture. However, this guy should be obligated to go by “PSY” and Gangnam Style dance wherever he goes. 

How can you not pick this Bulls squad? I mean this guy womped on Superman during the first part of a movie. 

Holy crap. You can pick up Fisher Stevens as a free agent! 

The White Mamba’s powers are so strong that they included him in this game even though he retired. 

Just because Pistol Pete was a badass…

Now it’s back to hitting the sticks….

Previous articleNebraska Cornhuskers Reportedly Find Next Athletic Director
Next articleThe Sad Seven – Making the Uninteresting Interesting
I'm the founder of and when I'm not too busy "founding" things I follow College Football and the NBA religiously. I'll also chime in about the NFL, College Basketball, the WWE and pop culture from time to time. Feel free to shoot me a line at Derek (at) NoCoastBias (dot) com if these 58 words don't suffice.


Leave a Reply